A Baby’s Prayer

Here are the lyrics to a wonderful, poignant song written by Scott Brasher and Kathy Troccoli. The song is on Kathy’s album, “Love and Mercy”.

There are videos on You Tube you can watch, as well.

A Baby’s Prayer

I can hear her talking with a friend
I think it’s all about me
Oh how she can’t have a baby now
My Mommy doesn’t see

That I feel her breathe, I know her voice
Her blood, it flows through my heart
God you know my greatest wish is that
We’d never be apart

But if I should die before I wake
I pray her soul You’ll keep
Forgive her Lord, she doesn’t know
That You gave life to me

Do I really have to say goodbye
Don’t want this time to be through
Oh please tell her that I love her Lord
And that You love her too

‘Cause if I should die before I wake
I pray her soul You’ll keep
Forgive her Lord, she doesn’t know
That You gave life to me

On the days when she may think of me
Please comfort her with the truth
That the angels hold me safe and sound
‘Cause I’m in Heaven with You
I’m in Heaven with You

Your child, created by loving father God lives inside you. Please let your child live. Don’t have an abortion. Have an ultrasound; see your child living and growing inside you. Give God a chance to work in your life and in the life of your child.

Donna


Creation, God’s Gift To Us And Himself

Age has a way of reminding us how great the gift of life and time is. I love fall, and the range of colors it brings.  One of my great desires is to be a “leafer”, and travel all the beautiful scenic routes.  I feel very close to my creator at this time of year.  Unfortunately, my finances and life are not equal to this ambitious travel desire, so, I’ve made a promise to myself to make the most of the colors and beauty around me.

My area of Nebraska doesn’t have the glorious abundance of orange and red leaves of hardwood trees like the eastern United States. I live on the Platte River, and it’s lined with the striking beauty of weather hardened cottonwood trees.  Their scarred branches reach up across the water proudly displaying their medals of honor.  Stunning gold, sunlight-reflecting waxy coated leaves that refuse to drop until the last frigid windy moment.  I’ve grown up with the cottonwoods and their sturdy familiarity and the soothing clacking sound their leaves make while bumping together in the western plains wind. The trees awaken family memories of my childhood  and cover me with peace.

In town, there are orange-hued maple trees and bright red shrubs. We baby the flowering blooms of hardy fall mums, covering them with old sheets when a hard freeze threatens and I’m not ready or willing, to give up their fall color.  Eventually, to my dismay and outspoken wishes for them to hang on, the trees drop their showy brilliance and the mums succumb to the cold. Life happens and moves on. It takes me longer . . .

You notice I said life, not death.  The trees still live and the flowers will sprout again in the spring.  Their appearance changes, but they do not die.  This last month, I’ve meditated on life and spent time praying and reading the bible during my lunch hours.  This fall I chose a few of those hours to drive around town and thanked God for His majestic creation. How blessed I am to see and enjoy it.  I noticed on the days I concentrated on God’s goodness, my attitude was much improved when I returned to my job after lunch.

During my drives I asked God questions, like, “Am I making a difference for Your kingdom here on earth?  Does what I do and prayers I pray really matter?”  He reminded me that I, too, was part of His creation, a very important part, as we ALL are.  He created us to have a relationship with Him, to know Him, not just know about Him.  A personal, intimate knowledge which comes only through spending time with Him.  I was doing this on my lunch times by praying and reading His word and asking the Holy Spirit to speak with me, but the state of being quiet before God and meditating on Him was how He answered a large part of my questions.

In the stillness, with a heart and mind focused on Father God, I could hear Him speak.

I’m learning to pray all the time, but especially at night, when I can’t sleep.  I ask God to forgive our nation for the sin of abortion, and I ask Him to do whatever it takes to stop it, not just here but everywhere.  I ask God for mercy and to shake what has to be shaken in order to make our country realize their need for Jesus Christ and the salvation and life He offers us. Yes, God is glorified in His creation, but His Son died and rose again for people.  People of all nations, that He loves and desires to dwell with in relationship. Abortion takes the life of His greatest creation.  Human beings, created in His image, for His glory, to be His sons and daughters. Each of us is unique and gifted with the qualities and talents to do His will on earth.

So, when you look and appreciate the beauty in nature around you, remember, we, God’s children, are His greatest and most valuable creation.

Father God gives only good gifts to His children.  We need to do the same.  Give our children life.

God bless each one of you.

Donna

 

 

 

 

 

Prayer For An Upside Down Heart

Neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.  Romans 8:39

Nothing can separate us from the love of Christ.  Nothing.  Then, why do I feel broken?  When I neglect my time alone with Father God, I allow anxiety, fear and the cares of this world to invade my heart, and if I don’t rebuke the evil one’s lies and replace them with God’s word about His love for me, His blessings and His care, I wind up in a mess.  Stirred up, angry, resentful and anxiety ridden.

I need alone time, but I go to bed and hope it passes.  It doesn’t.  I wake up.  It’s 2:00 in the morning.

“Father God,” I speak into my pillow. “I just want to sit at your feet.  I don’t want to ask for Your help again because you’ve done that so many times, helped me, blessed me.”

“Yet, You tell me to ask because You love me so much.  But, I think what’s going on in my upside down heart can be handled by resting in You.  I listen and wait, but the noise in my head is so loud it shuts out everything else, and the harder I try, the more the silence crowds me.”

I toss and turn.  My sheets tangle around my feet and I stare blankly at the ceiling, hoping this time will be a night You show me Your face, Father God, Your plans for me and for the people whose lives you’ve planned for my life to touch with Your love and grace. I cringe at the last thought.  In this state, how can I help anyone?

Quiet’s cymbals crash in my ears, and I sense my breathing quicken.  I put my hands on my chest, attempting to slow it’s rise and fall, to calm myself so I can sense the Holy Spirit’s quiet whisper.  “I know I’m not,” I speak into the dark. “But tonight . . . I feel lost.  I know Your Spirit lives inside me, so I can’t be without You no matter what I feel.”  That last thought signals my faith to rise.  I feel safe, and stop thrashing.

“So,” I whisper, “Help me, Lord, I love You.  Forgive me for allowing lies and fear to sit on Your throne in my heart instead of faith. I just want to be with You, now.”

I praise Him for His majesty and holiness.  Tears roll down my cheeks and puddle in my ears. “Thank you for loving me and holding me in the palm of Your hand and in Your unwavering heart.  You made me, You know all my days from the beginning of time.  You have a plan for me. Your constant faithfulness woos me.  Your strength carries me.”

The peaceful transition I long for begins.  I learned a long time ago about what the “deer panting for water” means.  As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, my God.  Psalms 42:1

Only the Father will satisfy my thirst.  Peace floods me and washes over me in waves, and after some time praying in the Spirit, I feel the weighty pressure of His presence. It’s like my body is being gently pushed down on the mattress and my breathing slows.  Every part of me noticeably, physically relaxes.  The calm is amazing. Nothing can come to me that He doesn’t allow and I remember again His mercy. Literally, I don’t want to move because I don’t want to ruin the heavy beauty of the moment.  I wait for His voice, or for Him to show me a picture or give me a scripture.  I inhale the thick peace cocooning me.

It’s wonderful.  Every time is like the first time I felt the weightiness of Him here with me.  I long for this, His presence, and He doesn’t disappoint.

Everything I brooded over fades away. It’s just God and me.

I wait in quietness.  He loves me back to sanity and peace, forgiving me for not taking my thoughts captive to Jesus Christ which is how I ended up in the chaos of “what ifs”.

God created each of us to have an intimate relationship with Him.  He wants us.  Make a place in your heart for Him to dwell.

Can God find a resting place in you?  I hope so.

Amen . . .

Donna

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Adoption, Abortion and the “October Baby” Movie

Gut wrenching, poignant and truthful, are just a few of the things I have to say about the movie I saw on Saturday, “October Baby”.  The movie is about a college age girl named Hannah, who discovers not only that she was adopted, but that she was the child of a failed abortion attempt.  The movie shares the 180 degree emotional upheavals of her life and her ultimate resolution of these feelings and the discoveries Hannah makes along the way. I don’t want to spoil the movie for those of you who haven’t seen it, so I won’t say more.

 First, I want to say, having two adopted children of my own,  you should ALWAYS tell them they are adopted.  Start when they’re very young with various things that are age appropriate for their understanding, and add to the details as conversations and situations happen, like birthdays and other family members delivering their babies and tell them how their arrival was different into your family, but NO LESS loved, awaited and prayed for.  Children are very accepting and curious, and when they grow up in a loving, safe environment, all the questions can be answered with love and respect.  Don’t offer more information than is necessary, and let the child take the lead as they grow older and may or may not want more info. Don’t cross bridges that may never need to be crossed, and if the bridges do appear, God in His grace and wisdom will help you with the answers.

The children you adopt know only you as mom or dad unless you adopted older children.  You were the one or ones who was there from the beginning, caring, loving, protecting, supplying their every need for life after birth.  Believe me, YOU are the parent or parents!  You are the “REAL” mom and dad!  Because my children are from Korea, people always wanted to know who their “REAL” mom was, and did I know her.  Inside I died at their ignorant questions, but I always answered, “I am their REAL mom”, the biological mother’s info was none of their business.  In every sense of the word “mother”, I am that person and so grateful to God for His merciful goodness to have my daughter and son . . .

There is a scene in the movie where someone answers Hannah’s questions about her arrival on this earth, and because of some other info she receives at this time, some brutal details are shared with her about the abortion process.  I read some media reviews about the movie, and one from the The New York Times equated the movie with false compassion, using the language of fear and guilt and portrays the info given to Hannah in this particular scene as reminiscent to bloody placards used outside of abortion clinics, showing fetal mutilation.  Well . . . excuse me, but that is exactly what happens during an abortion, depending upon the method used.  The baby IS mutilated and torn apart, to remove it from the mother’s body.  Read about abortion procedures such as, suction and curettage or dilation and evacuation.

People are upset when they hear the REAL details, and I would hope to the good Lord, they are.  They need to be.  What do they think happens, a magic wand is waived over the mother and the baby goes painlessly to heaven?  The process is BRUTAL.  It’s why pro-life people are so enraged and passionate about letting women know what really happens when they make THE CHOICE.

How does The New York Times critic equate someone loving and caring for someone elses child and raising it as their own, to false compassion?  Caring about what happens to the mothers choosing abortion and their physical and mental health, is that false compassion?  That boggles my mind.  Adoption and truth are the very picture of God’s love, here on earth.  There’s been so much purposefully wrong information given to women, so much language strategy used to make people think that unborn children are not human beings by refusing to use the nouns child or baby.

I love all of you reading this.  I’m quite passionate about the lives of our little ones, so dependant upon us, and about the lives of women who believe the lie that abortion is the answer to their problem.  God is the answer.  Only He can resolve what needs to done for the women and their babies. 

Give them life.  Give the babies a chance. 

I do love you.  Believe me . . . this is not easy to write about post after post, and it tears my heart out when I think of all the pain and beautifully broken lives in this vast world, where everyone is trying so hard to make the right choices.

You and your children are in my prayers.

Donna

Holidays Heartaches Healing and Children

When we look past the commercialism, crazy schedules and overspending we impose on ourselves, the majority of us look forward to the Christmas season and have fond memories of family, friends and special moments.  But for many people, the holidays represent sadness, depression, family disputes and heartache, and for women longing for a child, the story of the birth of Christ is a reminder of what is missing in their lives. A baby.

During my years of infertility, walking through the stores at Christmas and seeing the toys and children’s clothing so prominently displayed only intensified my pain.  I longed to buy the little red dresses and shiny patent shoes, the footballs, the train sets, all the things parents walking beside me were piling into their carts, while sometimes complaining about it, then checking off their lists.  There were no items on my list for a child and another hole opened in my heart for what was not to be.  After a few years, I protected myself and avoided the children’s departments.  I headed straight for the sections that had gifts for the adults in my family and planned trips to stores that sold only groceries for the holiday celebration.

When I thought it couldn’t get worse, my sisters-in-law who were both younger than myself and married after me, had babies.  Now, I had to listen to my parents and my in-laws extol the sweetness and beauty of the two granddaughters who graced their lives.  The babies were both very precious, and I loved them, but neither was mine, and now, I couldn’t escape the children’s sections any longer.

Children and Christmas are made for each other.  After all, the story of Christmas is about the birth of Jesus, the son of God, His miraculous entry into the earth, His plan for the salvation of mankind.  He was and is the perfect gift.

I share this with you because it’s easy to get caught up in your pain and forget the purpose of Christ’s birth which is salvation.  The highly important gift of forgiveness is not the only thing available in the word save, as used in Luke 9:56. “For the Son of  Man did not come to destroy men’s lives, but to save them” In the original Greek the word save, is sozo, which means complete salvation.  It has everything we need, forgiveness of sin, healing of disease and deliverance from torment.  Jesus came to save our whole body, mind and spirit.  Jesus does every thing well.  He loves every part of us and wants us to live victoriously now, here on earth.  Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done, on earth, as it is in heaven.  There is no sickness, disease, torment or lack in heaven.

Children are a blessing from God.  He wants to give you a child.  He wants to heal your body; He wants deliver your mind and spirit from torment and release them to His salvation.  You can ask Him for that.  You can ask Him to forgive you if you’ve had an abortion and He will.  He loves each of us and to prove it, He sent Jesus, His only son, for the purpose of dying and becoming our sin, our disease and our torment. In my post, Baby Showers, I prayed a prayer for conceiving a child and for forgiveness.  Read the prayer, pray it and believe in Jesus who came to give us the gift of Himself and all the goodness attached to Him.

May the blessing of God and His full intentions for you come to pass in your lifetime through God’s strength and power of the Holy Spirit.

Donna

Reconciliation Prayer

A few years ago I wrote a prayer for reconciling my heart with my son.  I’ve prayed it often about other people and circumstances, but mostly in regard to my attitude.  Time has brought the gift of wisdom in a few areas at least, and when the Holy Spirit reminds me to first remove the log from my eye so I can pray for others about the speck in theirs, I hasten to do so.

If you’ve read my posts, you know I have two children who are adopted.  I am their mother in every sense of that word and that includes the stresses, tensions and disappointments experienced by both the parent and the child.  My children bring me great joy and love, but we are human beings, and with that, we get the flaws and the pain as well.  Here is my prayer.  Use it as a guide to help in your life and parenting experience.

Reconcile my son to me.  Reconcile me to my son.  Cleanse us both and set us free from me verses him and him verses me.
Lord Jesus, dig up the lies from our hearts and expose them to the light of your truth.  Purge us, renew our minds and our hearts.
Cover us with your blood sacrifice.
Create in me a clean heart.  Give me yours.  Forgive us, both.  Protect us.
In your mercy, restore the time lost with joyful expectation.  Replace old memories of both our disappointments with fresh hope in you, Jesus.  Give us joy, belief, faith, certainty and the freshness of your Holy Spirit.
Grant us the restorative power of Your love.
Thank you for making us a family.  Help us always to remember how much we love each other.
Let it be this day as you led me to pray.  Amen!”
Donna

 

 

Baby Showers are a Blessing . . .

My niece is expecting her first child and I’m excited!  The baby is a boy, and he’s due on Christmas day.  What a gift!  Her due date is God’s reminder to us that all good and perfect gifts are from Him. Since my niece and her husband were dealing with infertility, I prayed and asked God to give them a child, and I know from experience He wants to answer those prayers.  So, I was not surprised to hear the marvelous news.  He wants abundant life for us and children are a part of that.

When I pray for a woman to be given a child, I always ask for her to conceive, but I’ve learned from my life, God has other ways of giving us our children and I leave the details of their arrival to Him.  In other words, I ask with expectation of His goodness towards us, but I know in His love and wisdom, sometimes God takes different routes to answer our prayers due to His view of the “big” picture of our lives.

I attended her baby shower last evening, and found myself experiencing a twinge of the old pain.  The, “you’ll never know what it’s like to carry a child in your body, to feel it grow, to be complete.”  I had to deal with the lie satan whispered in my ears.  At first he surprised me with his ambush.  I cried momentarily, then anger welled up inside me.  I told him in no uncertain terms, he had no place in my life and no right to spread his untruths.  I belong to Jesus, and I am a mother, in EVERY way that’s important after the child is born, and I am complete in that role and more importantly, complete in Christ and His view of me.

The lies stopped; my joy in God’s answered prayer in my and my niece’s life bubbled to the surface, and I enjoyed the shower, the sweet gifts that were given, the corny games played at such events and the camaraderie of women, experiencing with our friends and loved ones the immeasurable joy the arrival of a baby brings to all those connected with its life.

I watched my niece laugh, smile wistfully and cry.  Bittersweet emotions so close to the surface.  I was with her in those feelings.  Her father, my brother, died of cancer seven years ago at the age of 48.  He didn’t get to walk her down the aisle and he will not be at the hospital on the happy day her first child is born.  My brother loved airplanes, played a mean guitar and sang with talent and emotion.  My niece inherited his talents, and I wondered, which of those skills will pass to the next generation?

I honor of her dad, the baby’s nursery has airplanes and bears on the wall, and someone gave her little son a onesie, complete with an embroidered red electric guitar.  We cried.  We remembered.  We wished he would be here to laugh, kiss and cuddle his precious grandson. But God is good.  My brother’s bloodline passes to his own children he loved so dearly, and now, his grandchildren.

So, I thank God for baby showers and life that continues, even though there was a time in my life I did anything I could not to attend them.  Now, I see them as a blessing, a reminder of life and a celebration of God’s answered prayer.

I want to pray with you if you want a child.

“Father God, I thank you for your boundless love, mercy and goodness towards us.  If we as parents want to give good gifts to our children, how much more do You want to give good gifts to us.  You are not a man, and You do not lie.  I remind You of Your word, now, as I ask for the blessing of a child for the women praying with me.  Heal their bodies and their husband’s body if he needs your touch.  Mend their spirit and mind with Your love and goodness and give them their heart’s desire.  Give them the child they so desperately want.  You want life, not death.  We ask for that life now, in the name of Your son Jesus Christ.  Do for them what you’ve done for many other women I’ve prayed for.  You gave me children and now, my neice.  Let me hear from the women who pray this prayer with me the good news of Your blessing in their lives.  Thank you for loving us more than we can even ask or think.  Thank you for all the babies that will be born because of Your goodness.  In the name of Jesus we ask this.  AMEN!”

Don’t forget to email me and share the joy of your pregnancy or adoption.

Donna